By Marian Nicholson, MBE, director, Herpes Viruses Association

Herpes simplex is the virus that causes cold sores on the face, whitlows on the fingers and also genital herpes. There are two types which are very common with over 70% of adults carrying one or other or both, usually without ever having had recognisable symptoms. However, the word “herpes” has been stigmatised in the media, by comedians, etc. This stigma means that people who know they carry the virus – and that is only one in three of those who have it – are ashamed to stand up and challenge it. £450,000’s worth of award-winning destigmatisation has been done in New Zealand but this campaign has not reached the UK in any significant way.

Herpes simplex can recur at intervals. Unlike HIV, there is no medication that can guarantee that a partner could not catch the virus. As a result, the fear of starting a relationship may prevent some people from even trying. “I don’t mind having it, but I would die if I passed it on,” is a common sentiment. This is not a justified fear as a study by the Herpes Viruses Association has found that there is an 83% acceptance rate when a person chooses to mention that they have genital herpes to a partner.

For just a few of the diagnosed people, frequent recurrences are a real barrier to resuming a sex life. There is a very effective antiviral medication, but also the psychological attitude to the virus has been shown to make a difference: worrying increases recurrences and vice versa.

“Some people are full of confidence, and it all works out well for them when they choose to move on with their lives. Others lack confidence and don’t even try,” says Marian Nicholson, director of the Herpes Viruses Association. “Confidence will vary in different aspects of your life: work, appearance, social life, self-esteem (telling a partner) and in your ability to be healthy. Yes, being more confident about your herpes simplex can stop your outbreaks!”

Research gives the proof

Researchers at Imperial College, London have proved that patients with severe genital herpes can use brain power to control symptoms. 

Those who were taught to practise self-hypnosis halved their chance of seeing the condition return. Blood tests later revealed that these patients’ natural defence cells have “stepped up immensely” after the self-hypnosis treatment. This backs up other studies which show that the right attitude, mood and confidence can alter the balance of chemicals in the immune system.

The idea that with hypnosis you can control your outbreaks has been reported before. When Professor Simon Barton, was running the herpes clinic at the Chelsea & Westminster Hospital, he reported that “We have looked at hypnotising people. We did some work with people with frequent recurrences which showed that you can significantly reduce the number of recurrences.”

This trial also did not rely merely on the patients reporting fewer outbreaks, but, as he explained “We tied it up to immunological work” i.e. blood tests were taken and the results showed that helpful changes were created in the immune response. Barton suggests that hypnosis works by stopping the immune reduction which is brought on by too much stress. He added that “The trouble is that no drug company wants to sponsor research into this… [They cannot profit from it.] It was certainly worth doing, though it was very time consuming: people needed two sessions a week and then self-hypnosis at home.”

An example of this helpful change

The HVA has heard of a person who had hypnosis for non-smoking treatment who reported later that it had stopped his herpes simplex recurrences – even though this problem was not directly addressed.

What will the patient/client need?

The patient/client would talk over how they want the hypnosis to help with herpes simplex: some people need help controlling nerve pain, others need to control unrealistic anxiety or just gain confidence. It is important that the hypnotist understand that anything about ‘herpes’ that is scary or even just a bit worrying is wrong. The hypnotist should get the facts from the Herpes Viruses Association – details below.

We learned of a case where the therapist was unaware that the patient/client was labouring under a misapprehension. ‘Susie’ sought help because she ‘knew’ that she would never be able to conceive and give birth normally and was grieving. After a while, Susie discovered our helpline and was given the facts: normal conception (using antiviral therapy) and normal delivery. No further hypnotherapy was required (and Susie has a gorgeous boy.)

The number of follow-up sessions will depend on the problem and the patient/client.

Examples of some points that might be used during a session:

“Herpes simplex is common and usually trivial.”

“My body has all the tools it needs to control this virus; it just needs to put my antibodies into fighting mode.”

“I am the same person as I was before I caught this, I already had chickenpox virus and now I just have one more virus.”

“Because I know I have it, I am less likely to pass it on compared to all those people who have not had their mini-symptoms diagnosed.” [And there are twice as many of those people than there are of people with a diagnosis.]

Two examples:


Hypnotherapy works for me

My life has taken a turn for the better. I had my first herpes symptoms in the autumn of 2023 and had a confirmation in the GU clinic in Bournemouth in December. Since then, I have had outbreaks constantly: ranging from every 2 weeks, with sometimes as long as a 3-month break. This all changed last year when I had my last one in July 2024 and nothing since.

I am a 54-year-old male in pretty good health and quite fit for my age. But in October 2024, I had one of the bad bugs that was going round where I felt terrible for about 5 weeks but still no outbreak.

Now the only ‘cause’ I can think of for this marvellous break in my symptoms is that I have been ‘treated’ by a hypnotist in Poole. Let me be honest with you, I went to see him for a different reason. I always wanted to be able to approach girls more easily and he specialises in this area with a mix of training and hypnosis, but his direction is to make you a better man and the rest will follow. So, suffice it to say that I am far more relaxed than I was before. I never actually mentioned my herpes to him, but his solution seems to have a fantastic side effect.

So how do I feel now? I am more confident and have much better self-discipline and I am a lot happier. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I was even slightly depressed.  I have had a few bad moods, but they don’t last very long as I have the tools to get myself out of them.

(Name supplied)